Tag Archives: what would Oxford do?

Hold onto your hats kids, it’s gonna be a bumpy ride!


The Language of the Future …

dog language

De beeblebop of de dooflickies of de future full of WTFs and LOLs with tons of peeps knowing what de abbrevs are all about acoustically but unable to spell dem properly. Spelling will change drastically and de decasyllabic words will join de dinosaurs in de annals of etymology. All consonants will be gone and either replaced with a hard letter (like as in de) or some new-found combination of the two much like you find in many of the Nordic countries today. So kn might be a k with a line through it …

English will become infused with words from other languages, especially Chinese Mandarin and Indian terminology (much like French and Latin phrases that we have cultivated are already thought of as English by most nowadays) and it will no longer be called English but World Language and it will be used throughout the world as the first spoken language of all people (for the most part). People will maintain their indigenous languages but this will be relegated to the elite and educated and very few people will speak more than one or two languages. A staggering proportion of the world population will only speak one.

This will have a horrific impact on things like the Opera and other mediums where language is huge aspect of the medium because there will be so few performers available who can do it the native tongue that it will become virtually unheard of. A bit of a digression here, but the whole demise of the creative arts as a result is another topic, but I felt it was closely related and bore mentioning …

Of course there are ever new and more prolific ways of swearing and isms for the day, much like we’re referring to ‘twerking’ at the moment (I like that that word sounds exactly like what it is, someone moving around like a fucking jerk!) Swearing will no longer be considered profanity but used more as adjectives and adverbs and due to this acceptability swearing has been replaced with this new sub-culture of profanities in different languages as well as dialects that some people are not aware of, resulting in a lot of people looking bewildered and confused when some youth is attempting to flip them off in a manner of speaking. The mutation of the language will happen at such a rate that a few years age difference will result in an inability to communicate for the most part because older people will become ‘stuck’ with their phraseologies and terms of the day and not, for the most part, move with the times. This will create an almost caste-like system in terms of language and everything will be based around appealing to ‘that’ demographic in terms of obtaining their money so advertising, restaurants and so forth will all be defined by their language usage as opposed to their product per se. Advertisers will be scrambling trying to appeal to the masses. Luckily this will also make most form of advertising, billboards, commercials, etc. ineffective from a cost perspective so they will have to find some other medium to ‘win over the crowd’, but that’s not my place to speculate.