Saw this title and it pricked a nerve for sure for me. I have not been writing for ages – and, in fact, in almost every blog of late, I have rambled on about how I have not been writing – how tedious! I have not had inspiration because there has been little angst in my life and oh so little excitement – to put it bluntly, I’m bored! And I mean hella bored. I’m also getting older and lacking inspiration. What I really need is to fall in love again. I really miss being in love, or being excited over someone. I miss passion in all its many forms. And that is why I have no impetus to write, there’s no passion.
I know it sounds stupid but I don’t want to look for someone either. I want to be walking down the street, or be at the gym, or be at the grocery store and bump into this person and just “bam!” have it happen. Is that really so incomprehensible?
When I think of the word ‘thorny’ I naturally think of roses, and roses are equated with love and so it brings me back round to – I miss being in love. Someone told me the other day that I have lost my luster and I think that was spot on – no joie de vivre. I can’t remember the last time I missed or yearned or longed for someone …
On another thorny note, I have a co-worker that I absolutely loathe because she has no life and is constantly trying to micromanage mine. So now I’ve found ways to fight back – ha! Unfortunately I have had to adopt some much abhorred passive-aggressive behaviour to combat this but oh well, better than sitting here stewing in my own juices.
So by way of background, let me give you the whole story on this situation. I have been at my job now for two years and four months. Two of this was sheer and utter hell, I had a verbally abusive boss and co-worker, they micro-managed me, berated me and were just negative nellies ALL THE TIME! For me, I realize that I am spending the vast majority of my days in this hell hole so why not try and make it as pleasant as possible? These women obviously subscribe to another school of thought. Then to top it off, we had this lunatic come to work here that not only was insufferable to work with but sat behind me, complained about everything and made my life hell. I went to HR about it even (after I caught her looking at my email FFS! Total invasion of privacy, it was before her three month probation was up and the should have fired her on the spot) they told me to suck it up. Un-friggin-believable!
But I did because I had recently been unemployed for nearly two years and was petrified that I’d be in the same boat again – let’s face it, I’m no spring chicken here either, the job market in my field blows and I did not want to end up in a Mcjob “do you want fries with that” situation. So I persevered, oh and drank a shit load! On Fridays I could not wait to get off work and start chugging my way into oblivion – this also might have to do with the dull as dishwater situation that I’m in now with my life as well, but I digress.
Anyway, back to the matter at hand – so thrill of thrills, in the spring of this year my boss from hell retired! I honestly didn’t realize how utterly atrocious my work setting was until she left. Then I was just stuck with the co-worker, but it wasn’t so bad because with just the two of us, she now had to rely on me more and things were humming along – albeit at break neck speed because for six months we were down three people, including a boss.
It was tough at times, but we managed and both knew it wouldn’t be that way forever. Out of sheer necessity, she got “promoted” – a big fucking joke if you ask me, she is the most ill-equipped person on the planet to oversee others. Not to mention, her tone of voice when speaking to others is just abominable most times. (By way of background this person has NO social life whatsoever and, from what I can tell, friends that are few and far between. It’s sad really, most weekends she goes to the movies by herself, or hangs out with her parents – she is past 50 years old, never been married and has two cats.)
Nothing bad about the cats by the way, I have a cat, I’m actually glad she has a cat, it’s nice to know she has some company. I feel sorry for her in that regard. But as far as her treatment of me at work goes – holy fuck dude, get a life and stop friggin’ micromanaging me – oh and just of note, it’s only me. Other co-workers have said stuff to me and our senior boss about it too. Still it’s gone on for quite some time.
But now – HALLELUJAH! – we have a new boss whom I love in comparison to the old one. She’s sweet, she’s relaxed and now miss micromanage is in the minority and, if she’s not careful, on her way out as well. Ain’t nobody got time for that.
AAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaanyway – to give you an example, as I was writing this – (it’s been really slow for the last few days, and I’ve been thinking rather than spending hours on Crackbook, I’d try and do something at least somewhat creative, so I started writing this), miss fucking nosey parker saw I was writing and messages me asking me to do a “rush job” – even though there are 4 other operators sitting out there with nothing to do (we are a national firm, so have operators in other offices). I ALREADY have a job I’m working on – it’s not due until one so I wanted to sit on it for a bit and do this at the same time, but she sees me not working and gets her fucking panties in a bunch. Sooooooooo she asks me if I can do the rush job, I say “yeah sure” – pick it up, put it in partial and complete my other job instead. By the time I’m finished, someone else has picked up the rush job so “HA!” I can’t tell you how good that made me feel. I know it’s petty but this whole situation is petty. Fighting fire with fire, okay, I’m bad but damn, it felt so good!