I started writing again a a few weeks back in my online journal, but no one can reads that (thankfully) because most of it’s ranting and boring drivel anyway, and yes I do talk about the weather. We live in Canada, it’s a thing. However, there’s no one who can read it. So I thought I’d start yammering along on here too. (Not that anyone will read it either, but at least here there’s a slight chance someone might come across it and either respond or have it help them through something.)

I’m pretty happy for the most part but I miss having someone to talk to on the regular. I miss having someone to call up and tell them all my little daily accomplishments. Silly things like I got a new shower curtain …

I had something happen that made my world shift a little and now I’m dealing with my “new world” which unfortunately doesn’t include a bestie that I can call up every day. Don’t get me wrong, I have several really good awesome gal pals (kind of sucks that three of them are across the country …) but I don’t have someone close by that I want to hang out with on the regular, you know? I miss having someone to stay up late with and giggle about men and stuff. I used to have a couple of men friends too but they seemed to have all but disappeared. Well one is a conspiracy theorist, anti-masker so I just couldn’t even in that conversation and we haven’t talked since.

And it’s not like I’m not trying either, I’m reaching out to people, making myself available – trying to kick it up a notch in the friendship department but people aren’t even responding for the most part, never mind making excuses. (Except as above, certain gal pals aside.)

I gave up the whole missing having a boyfriend thing quite some time ago. I’m trying to make my peace with the idea of not having one of those in the foreseeable or maybe ever. I’m very sad that I never got to get married. Not sad I didn’t have kids, especially now. Honestly I think bringing a child into the world at this point in time is morally reprehensible but that’s just my opinion.