I don’t know if it’s really the saddest or harshest criticism anymore because I am well aware of the fact that I talk too much, however at this point it’s something I’ve accepted in myself and I’ve realized that I hate when people don’t talk enough so … One of my biggest beefs in a lot of my relationship is that my partner wasn’t being forth coming with their feelings and then resenting me because I didn’t know how they were feeling. Really?! What are you a girl? Sorry but that is so the stereotypical girl statement of ‘you should know how I’m feeling’ what do I look like Kreskin?!
What I don’t like is that I don’t know how to listen properly. It is only in the last few years that I have started to realize how skewed my perspective is and how much I mould things round to the way I wanted them to sound versus what was actually said. It’s an extreme form of lying to oneself that I’m really not sure how to combat. I mean if you think you heard x, y, z how can you go back and hear it properly? It’s something I’ve been wrestling with for the last few months because I’m trying to decipher where my lies end and the other person’s begins OR am I totally misconstruing nearly everything I hear and switching it in my head to suit my views? I have honestly thought about installing a close-circuit camera and monitoring our conversations so I can see just how bad my misperception of situations are (also, maybe so the other party in the situation can see that sometimes they make these same mistakes too, but that is a whole different conversation and we’re not here to talk about them), this is the Danielle show.
Kind of funny too because I’ve had the flu for the past few days and today I woke up with laryngitis. Man the irony in my life is just endless.