Interesting


Interest

Interesting is one of those loaded words, like if someone says to me “oh your haircut’s interesting”, that’s a huge red flag for me. If someone says oh that person’s very interesting, that’s either ‘hey, they’re fascinating and great to talk to’ or ‘they’re a bit off and should be steered well clear of’. So to me interesting is very interesting word.

I wish I found myself more interesting and was a little more self-absorbed, I think it would make me a lot more of a passionate and dedicated writer. When I was young I was so full or righteous indignation, it was, for a large part I’m sure, misplaced but it gave me such fuel. I was able to just sit down and bang of pages at a time about any number of topics.

Also, I have been majorly affected by social media and how censored it has become. All these SJWs out on their supposed moral high ground allegedly fighting for protection and rights willing to shred someone to pieces at a moment’s notice with no regard of the far reaching impact this might have. At least here if I rage on about a topic or someone, it’s not at their personal expense because, unless I name them specifically, no one knows who I’m talking about. Plus, hardly anyone reads my blog so although it’s “public” I feel I can post my personal opinions here without necessarily getting a strip torn off of me.

So I think what has happened is that because Facebook and other social media platforms have almost compelled me to stifle most of my heartfelt opinions for fear of reprisal this has trickled over into my personal love for writing. I feel like I have nothing to say anymore but I suspect it’s more like I’m censoring my emotions and my feelings internally as well and that can’t be good.

Which brings me to all the violence in this world that seems to be escalating at an alarming rate in our immediate vicinity (i.e. Canada and the U.S.) and when I look at this and I look at how much our society is repressing us on so many levels in terms of self-expression and being able to let loose and just have at ‘er, I’m really not surprised. I say bring back good ol’ fist fights and insults and let kids sort it out among themselves and grow and mature properly instead of being stifled and controlled so much that they grow up into teenagers and young adults thinking nothing about wielding guns and shooting people over parking spaces. We are not “protecting” our children by teaching all this “tolerance” and “acceptance” carte blanche – people should have to earn respect and acceptance not just be granted it piece meal. And also, compelling people to be accepting of everything and everyone is going to have the opposite affect. Let children form their own opinions, let them learn to discern what’s right and wrong. Teach them that there is a reward system in the world. Fuck this everybody gets a badge for participating shit. Teach kids that there are winners and losers and hard work is rewarded.

Ahhh and there’s some of the old groove back, how interesting! Think I need to do more daily prompts!

This Article was Refused Publication in my Co-op’s Weekly News Letter Allegedly for Human Rights Violations – Where are my Rights in all This?


HOARDING IN OUR CO-OP

I would like to address the topic of hoarding in this co-op and bring it into an open forum in order that we might put some policies in place regarding same to protect the health and well being of everyone in this co-op and not be at the mercy of the hoarders.

Obviously I am writing this because it is at present affecting me personally, and I would like to stipulate to the fact that when addressing this issue I have tried my best to do it through the proper channels.

1. First I tried on countless occasions (over many years in fact) to offer my assistance.

2. I wrote to the office who subsequently took the issue to the Board. I have been told that “it is being addressed” but unfortunately, if said “hoarder” is uncooperative and refuses help, we as a co-op at this juncture have little or no recourse. There is no system in place to monitor or ensure that hoarders are being looked after or getting the help that they need AND if they refuse help, currently we have no avenue of recourse.

3. I called the various authorities and asked that they come and investigate, again, they can do little else except ask that things be brought up to code and/or rectified in this situation. If there person does not comply the situation is moot.

http://toronto.ctvnews.ca/landlord-groups-call-for-guidance-on-dealing-with-hoarders
Landlord groups call for guidance on dealing with hoarders …
toronto.ctvnews.ca
Two groups representing more than 2,500 landlords in Ontario say they’d like to do more to deal with tenants who have hoarding problems, but want guidance from fire …
This article is from 2011. It states (among other things):

“The landlord-tenant laws in the province make it hard for property owners to inspect a suite or evict problem renters, he added.

“What our system fails to do is recognize the rights and concerns of all the other tenants around,”

So basically, as it stands, we are at the mercy of the hoarders.

However, we as a co-op we have the opportunity to change this by implementing a by-law that stipulates to:

(a) defining a hoarder; and

(b) compelling them to get assistance or face eviction.

I do not know why this has not been implemented as of yet, as we have had two fires that I know of due to these situations and at present, we are at risk by hoarders living among us.

My suggestion is that during annual inspections, those people doing said inspections should submit to the board those units that they consider hoarding situations and they should then be assessed on a case by case basis and measures implemented to assist said person in dealing with said situation. Perhaps we develop an ad-hoc committee for same.

The criteria can be assessed as to fire risks, state of apartment (is the person living in filth, are there bugs or other health risks), etc. Are they placing those around them at risk?

In the meantime, where is the protection for those of us living around said hoarders?

Obviously, my motives are somewhat selfish at this point as I am currently in a state of stress as I know of at least two in my immediate vicinity of varying degrees that have been allowed to exist in said state for many, many years with little or no interference from the co-op or the city due to their limited capabilities as defined by the Human Rights Code.

Yesterday, for the first time since I have lived in this co-op I saw a cockroach in my kitchen. To what extent am I to be held hostage by this situation before something is done to protect me and my fellow neighbours?

In the meantime, I have been recommended by 311 to call on a regular basis and continually file complaints, I suggest if you have concerns regarding your living situation you do the same.

The areas of note are:

Toronto Board of Health – 416.338.7600
Fire Services – 416.338.9050
Animal Enforcement Services and Mobile Response – 416-338-PAWS (7297)

Here are some suggestions to implement a standard for our co-op, to protect our members based on the Landlord and Tenant act if we need a model to go by.

Filthy Apartment: What is a Landlord to do? – Google
ontariolandlordandtenantlaw.blogspot.ca
What is a clean and acceptable apartment to one person may be viewed as an utter disaster to another person. To a certain degree, how a person to chooses to live …

Retribution!!!


<a href="http://Thorny“>Thorny

Saw this title and it pricked a nerve for sure for me. I have not been writing for ages – and, in fact, in almost every blog of late, I have rambled on about how I have not been writing – how tedious! I have not had inspiration because there has been little angst in my life and oh so little excitement – to put it bluntly, I’m bored! And I mean hella bored. I’m also getting older and lacking inspiration. What I really need is to fall in love again. I really miss being in love, or being excited over someone. I miss passion in all its many forms. And that is why I have no impetus to write, there’s no passion.

I know it sounds stupid but I don’t want to look for someone either. I want to be walking down the street, or be at the gym, or be at the grocery store and bump into this person and just “bam!” have it happen. Is that really so incomprehensible?

When I think of  the word ‘thorny’ I naturally think of roses, and roses are equated with love and so it brings me back round to – I miss being in love. Someone told me the other day that I have lost my luster and I think that was spot on – no joie de vivre.  I can’t remember the last time I missed or yearned or longed for someone …

On another thorny note, I have a co-worker that I absolutely loathe because she has no life and is constantly trying to micromanage mine. So now I’ve found ways to fight back – ha! Unfortunately I have had to adopt some much abhorred passive-aggressive behaviour to combat this but oh well, better than sitting here stewing in my own juices.

So by way of background, let me give you the whole story on this situation. I have been at my job now for two years and four months. Two of this was sheer and utter hell, I had a verbally abusive boss and co-worker, they micro-managed me, berated me and were just negative nellies ALL THE TIME! For me, I realize that I am spending the vast majority of my days in this hell hole so why not try and make it as pleasant as possible? These women obviously subscribe to another school of thought. Then to top it off, we had this lunatic come to work here that not only was insufferable to work with but sat behind me, complained about everything and made my life hell. I went to HR about it even (after I caught her looking at my email FFS! Total invasion of privacy, it was before her three month probation was up and the should have fired her on the spot) they told me to suck it up. Un-friggin-believable!

But I did because I had recently been unemployed for nearly two years and was petrified that I’d be in the same boat again – let’s face it, I’m no spring chicken here either, the job market in my field blows and I did not want to end up in a Mcjob “do you want fries with that” situation. So I persevered, oh and drank a shit load! On Fridays I could not wait to get off work and start chugging my way into oblivion – this also might have to do with the dull as dishwater situation that I’m in now with my life as well, but I digress.

Anyway, back to the matter at hand – so thrill of thrills, in the spring of this year my boss from hell retired! I honestly didn’t realize how utterly atrocious my work setting was until she left. Then I was just stuck with the co-worker, but it wasn’t so bad because with just the two of us, she now had to rely on me more and things were humming along – albeit at break neck speed because for six months we were down three people, including a boss.

It was tough at times, but we managed and both knew it wouldn’t be that way forever. Out of sheer necessity, she got “promoted” – a big fucking joke if you ask me, she is the most ill-equipped person on the planet to oversee others. Not to mention, her tone of voice when speaking to others is just abominable most times. (By way of background this person has NO social life whatsoever and, from what I can tell, friends that are few and far between. It’s sad really, most weekends she goes to the movies by herself, or hangs out with her parents – she is past 50 years old, never been married and has two cats.)

Nothing bad about the cats by the way, I have a cat, I’m actually glad she has a cat, it’s nice to know she has some company. I feel sorry for her in that regard. But as far as her treatment of me at work goes – holy fuck dude, get a life and stop friggin’ micromanaging me – oh and just of note, it’s only me. Other co-workers have said stuff to me and our senior boss about it too. Still it’s gone on for quite some time.

But now – HALLELUJAH! – we have a new boss whom I love in comparison to the old one. She’s sweet, she’s relaxed and now miss micromanage is in the minority and, if she’s not careful, on her way out as well. Ain’t nobody got time for that.

AAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaanyway – to give you an example, as I was writing this – (it’s been really slow for the last few days, and I’ve been thinking rather than spending hours on Crackbook, I’d try and do something at least somewhat creative, so I started writing this), miss fucking nosey parker saw I was writing and messages me asking me to do a “rush job” – even though there are 4 other operators sitting out there with nothing to do (we are a national firm, so have operators in other offices). I ALREADY have a job I’m working on – it’s not due until one so I wanted to sit on it for a bit and do this at the same time, but she sees me not working and gets her fucking panties in a bunch. Sooooooooo she asks me if I can do the rush job, I say “yeah sure” – pick it up, put it in partial and complete my other job instead. By the time I’m finished, someone else has picked up the rush job so “HA!” I can’t tell you how good that made me feel. I know it’s petty but this whole situation is petty. Fighting fire with fire, okay, I’m bad but damn, it felt so good!

Qualm – the Opposite of Calm, Who Knew?! OH Kwam, I See.


via Daily Prompt: Qualm

Yeah, I had to look it up first as defined by Oxford:

An uneasy feeling of doubt, worry, or fear, especially about one’s own conduct; a misgiving.

‘military regimes generally have no qualms about controlling the press’ “
And then I was all like “oh kwams – I probably knew how to spell that at some point and completely forgot, lol. So I had no qualms about continuing to write about it as I now knew what the word was. English is a really weird language. I feel sorry for anyone trying to learn it, although have you seen Japanese?! Picture letters, although I guess with so few people actually ‘writing’ these days, everything’s a lot easier with keyboards, voice intuitive programs, translation programs, etc. I mean realistically you could have an entire conversation with someone whose language you don’t speak through these mechanisms and still communicate fairly well. Although, I don’t know if you’ve used Google translate or whatever, but some of the faux pas can be quite hysterical and totally inappropriate, so I’d have qualms about just leaving it up to a program without any comprehension of what it was actually saying. You can never fully decipher context properly, and a lot of times I’ve been frustrated because I can’t remember the colloquial phrase and it just gives me a stupid literal translation which, thanks program I could have used a dictionary if I wanted that, does not always serve you well.
I have qualms about being honest on social media lately, someone righteously pointed out to me that Facebook (Crackbook) is not a place for opinions and they were so right and I never even thought about it before then and when I did, I realized that it all boiled down to my being lazy, using a social media platform when in fact, I should stop looking at memes and cute dogs and kittens so much and actual get on a site that might educate and inform me a bit and get back to reading stuff that, you know, took more than 30 seconds. Oh my gawd, how my attention span has dwindled! I found this when I wrote an entry here the other day. I was all, hey that was a pretty good entry and I looked back and it was like three paragraphs, it kind of made me sad.
So now I’m trying to change some recently developed habits, which shouldn’t be too hard as they are ‘recent’. I’ve started going back to the gym again, that’s something, now if only I could start reading again more extensively. I reluctantly have to admit that I will have to limit myself from Crackbook from now on. I swear it is stunting my mental capacity and it certainly is lessening my attention span. So that’s my small blather for today. Be well, and be nice to yourself and don’t have any qualms about changing for the good because most of the time, change is good!

Temporary is a state of being


via Daily Prompt: Temporary

Temporary is a great thing because it means this too shall pass. Temporary can be unsettling because it may not last. Temporary is fluid and constantly in a state of flux. Temporary is a good description of your situation as you move from here to there but aren’t quite where you want to be yet.

Right now I am temporarily in limbo and trying to move through it as gracefully as possible – which, unfortunately, because it is a state of the heart will take some time. I’m okay with that.

I’m not okay with the state of my body and hoping that is definitely going to be a temporary thing. I have told people, I have written it down and now I’m putting it in print – I am joining the YMCA today. Hopefully that will light a fire under my ever widening behind. I miss the gym, I miss the rush, I miss that fix that is like nothing else.

It’s so silly too because I know doing that will make me feel better and get me out of this temporary state of depression that much faster, but I get home at the end of the day and I’m all “ughhh life is so hard, poor me, I’ll take care of the dogs and eat chocolate and other crappy food that’s not good for me, watch t.v., crackbook and sulk”, so you can see how easily I got here.

I have been a gym rat several times in my life and I’ve always enjoyed it. But I’ve always had a hard time getting myself to start again, every time it seems to get harder. What is it about humans that prevents us from doing exactly what we need, what is the best thing for us and what we know will make us feel better? Why are we so self-defeating and destructive?

Every day I see things about the human condition that make me sad and bring tears to my eyes. I worry for the state of this world and the utter chaos we seem to be living in with so many different cultures and beliefs encroaching on each other. I do not think any good can come from this. I think our current blissful state is very much temporary at this point and it’s all going to come crashing down at an alarming rate in the not too distant future. I don’t think we’ll have the luxury of WordPress, I think we’ll be running for our lives.

Luckily my stay here is only temporary.